If you pray hard enough and have enough faith, God will do what you ask, right? This whole prayer warrior thing just wears me out. Maybe I did and maybe I didn’t pray “enough.” Is there some meter God uses and when you reach a certain level, then the bell rings and you’re a winner?
Loser
If so, then I’m a loser. All that prayer and unwavering belief left me alone and hurting with a wound I didn’t think would heal. It didn’t help that I set my eyes on the things behind me and parked smack in the middle of my pain. Oh, I put on my game face and tackled the world, but you want the truth? I was disappointed God didn’t answer my prayers.
How much is enough?
Surely I had enough faith and my prayers were in line with God’s will. I proclaimed it many times believing that God would do a miracle and the end wouldn’t be the end. The doubt in the eyes of others spilled out as pity; apparently the experienced and the experts have read this script before. Though sure my outcome would be different and I’d have that testimony to proclaim, it wasn’t.
Now what do I do with these verses?
“…But with God, everything is possible.” Matthew 19:26 (NLT)
“And I will do whatever you ask in my name…” John 14:13 (NIV)
Burdened with prayer
When you cry out to God and get the opposite of what you asked, it’s hard to imagine why God allowed it. If death rather than healing comes, it feels like our prayers weren’t answered.
“…how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!” Matthew 7:11 (ESV)
Altared plans
Abraham laid Isaac on the altar and God showed him a better way. God provided a substitute that was better, as a foreshadowing of when he provided the perfect lamb that was best. But Abraham had to let go of what he held dear. So do I.
Praying our will be done leads to disappointment when they aren’t answered the way we want or in our time. The truth is God’s plan is always better, which sometimes means He has to pry my fingers off what I want to open my hands to receive the better. No, the best. He substitutes His best.
“The Lord will answer when I call to him.” Psalm 4:3 (NLT)
Letting go and taking hold
Are you squeezing the life out of something God is asking you to let go? Don’t think if you try harder God is obligated to fix your circumstances. God is God and He allows what he allows. Sounds like bad news, but it isn’t because He also makes all things new. Now I know that what God is giving me is better than what I gripped for dear life and lost.
“For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.” Matthew 7:8 (NLT)
Keep praying
Never stop praying, never give up, but remember that sometimes you have to let go and take hold of God’s enoughness. Don’t miss His best, because someday you’ll look back and see that God had a plan all along.
Dear friends, I know some of you have experienced unspeakable heartache and loss. In no way am I saying that God’s will is for us to suffer or for the ones we love to die. But know this – God is sovereign and He can be trusted, even when you are disappointed. He redeems all things, but that doesn’t guarantee we see it on this side of eternity. Keep the faith!
Today you wrote to me and for me. I have cried out to God for over 5 years for family healing, but your words remind me God is sovereign and knows far more than I do about how he uses people and circumstances in His plan.
This makes baring my soul worth it. Praying for healing
I have disappointments I have talked to the Lord about in regards to why he hasn’t done what his word says in the way I think they should work. But, hey he’s God and I’m his creation. His ways are so much higher than mine. I know he knows best and so I continue to trust him. One day I will understand.
That is true faith
I enjoyed your words of love, faith, and God. I have learned that often things are removed from us by God to teach me more than I could have learned with them. That would include all losses. God is generous, but he teaches well. As I have told my kids, this is tough love!
What a great perspective on loss. Thanks for sharing